The Best Advice I Ever Got

If you are the richest man in the world with a net worth of $50 billion, what would you consider as the best advice that you ever got?

Bill Gates created the Microsoft empire and has amassed a huge fortune since 90% of the world’s computers run on their operating system. (Unfortunately, I belong to the 10% who don’t use the Windows platform.) Last June 2009, he stepped down from the day to day operation of Microsoft to focus on philantrophy. He is now running the world’s largest charitable organization – the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation valued at $27.5 billion. He co-chairs with his dad, Bill Gates Sr.

When asked [by Fortune magazine, July 6, 2009] what was the best advice he ever got, his response was his dad encouraged him to do things that he wasn’t good at –in sports like soccer, swimming and football. (This is contrary to some leadership teachings that says you only focus on things that you are good at.) What it did to him was to be exposed to different leadership opportunities and it also showed him that he wasn’t good at a lot of other things. Talk about teaching humility the hard way.

Bill’s father, Bill Gates Sr. made sure that he would get along with and encourage the right things with his kids. Family traditions and values are observed. His dad and mom even took parent effectiveness training in their church.

We can see two things:
1.    As a parent, don’t underestimate the impact of your influence over your child.
Prov. 22:6  Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

2.    As you are growing up, never cut your ties with your parents for advice. This is still seen now in their foundation since Bill’s dad co-chairs with him. Bill Sr. is still considered as the voice of wisdom for Bill.
Prov. 19:20  Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.

I remember asking my mom and dad for advice many years ago as I was making a decision whether to go to business or become a pastor. They said, “Never make decisions based on money.” I decided to be a pastor and never had any regrets. Thanks for your wisdom, Mom and Dad!

What about you, “What’s the best advise you ever got?”

I Love You Three Times A Day

A happy marriage can be elusive to some but a reality to others. I married Shirley in 1990 at the age of 22. And God gave us wonderful children after almost twenty years of marriage- Bea, Jerome (+), Ana and Andrea. I am so grateful to God for the wife that He’s given me. We realize that marriage is not just something that we coast along with. It takes a lot of hard work in order to build a strong marriage.
We are called to honor God in our marriages. We need to protect our marriage vows. After God, the most important human relationship we need to keep and prioritize is that of our spouse.

What you honor, you value.  And what you value, you prioritize.

Eph. 5:22  ¶     Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
Eph. 5:25  ¶     Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Some of the ways that we can honor our spouse and help boost our marriages are:

•    Everyday you need to listen to the most important voice in heaven. Likewise, we need to listen to the most important voice on earth – your spouse.
•   Meet your spouse’s needs. Don’t just look at your needs.
•    Have a regular date night. Many of the conflicts can be avoided when you have a consistent time together just to bond.
•    Engage in meaningful conversation – one that has emotional connection. This requires talking and listening (on both sides).

•    Respect your spouse’s opinion. You don’t monopolize all the world’s wisdom.
•    Say “I love you” at least three times a day. No, its not a title to a movie but it’s one good habit that we need to have.
•    Kiss passionately. Yup! You heard me right. It bonds you almost instantaneously. Medical science gives several benefits of kissing. It releases tension. It aids in weight loss. It slows the aging process. It increases fitness. It boosts self-esteem. And it prevents tooth decay (I think you have to do it with brushing.) Just to name a few.
•    Have sex regularly. I’d rather not elaborate on this one.

A good, no, a great marriage not only honors God but is also the most precious gift that you can give your children.

Don’t Wait to Say It Til They’re Dead. . . (4 Funerals and a Wedding)

This past week I have seen 4 funerals of people that I know. Two of them are family members of church members and the other 2 are celebrities – Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson.
One thing I notice about funerals is that friends and relatives would  honor their dead through eulogy which is a tribute to the person who passed away.
I was deeply touched by the stories and testimonies that friends and family shared about the deceased. Those were wonderful words of appreciation.

Eccl. 7:1 A good name is better than fine perfume, and the day of death better than the day of birth.

Solomon said that death is better than birth because death is the summation of a person’s life. What will people say about us when we are finally lying down in our casket?  What would you like them to say about you? The words spoken are dependent on how you live your life NOW and how you will nurture the relationships that you have.

While I agree that words of honor should be said about a person when he is dead to summarize his life’s accomplishments and celebrate the relationships that he made. We need to take the time to honor our loved ones while they are still alive.  Let them hear how much we love and appreciate them.

Do not wait until they are dead before you say those beautiful speeches.

Say it while they can hear it.

In contrast, a wedding is an ocassion where the couple openly say what they feel for each other.

I like going to  weddings. It’s a celebration of a couple’s love for each other.

Tonight, I am officiating a renewal of vows ceremony for a couple in church. They have been married for 25 years.  They will be expressing their commitment to one another. And they will do it publicly before friends and family. They will say how much they love and appreciate each other and will make a promise that they will be faithful to the other until the very end.

Of course, words of affirmation should not just be said during the wedding ceremony but should be a regular part of the married life.

1Th. 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Strength of Our Home

As the whole world celebrated Father’s day yesterday, we the Marquez family did our share of celebrating. My sister Tin-Tin organized an impromptu dinner in Amarula (a new resto in Prez Ave. in BF) for the three Marquez dads – my dad, me and Bernard.

I want to thank God for my dad. People call him Tito Bert or “groovy” because he is. (I’m not sure if the young ones know the meaning of this word). His grandchildren (eight in all) love to play with him. Who would not want to play with a fun loving lolo?

He is one reliable and very resourceful. I realize that every time I need something — like having the car fixed or bringing my daughter to school when I’m not around, he would readily volunteer and meet the need.

He is not a rich business mogul but he has given us three siblings a good education and a good name. He would remind us as we were growing up to always protect the Marquez name. At 67, he still has an active lifestyle – bikes, plays golf, swims regularly, etc. He takes care of our mom especially after she underwent angioplasty. He is indeed the strength of our home. He is our model father.

Love you dad. Thanks for always being there for us!